Monday, July 20, 2015

Let Her Eat Cake

Ah, birthday cake. Something that seems so simple but can be so complicated when you're dealing with food allergies.

I actually dread birthday party invitations - when Olivia gets invited to a birthday party I know that there's a really good chance she won't be able to eat the birthday cake. Granted there are a couple of parents who go out of their way to (1) bake a safe cake so, or (2) order a safe cake. But that's more of an exception than the rule.

Olivia recently went to a friend's party where the cake was from an "unsafe" bakery and she couldn't have it. She said she was OK about not eating the cake, but I could tell she was a bit sad too.

[Now this is the point where some people will say, "you should have sent her with something to eat!" to which I would respond "Yes, I could have. But I didn't because I didn't think I would need to based on other parties at this house. And that failure is totally on me." So don't judge until you're in MY shoes.]

At that party Olivia was able to enjoy all the other food (including the vanilla ice cream) and she kept insisting that she wasn't too upset about the cake. Me? I would have liked to talk with the parent before the party to know what was being served. But I don't always get what I want.

As difficult at "friend parties" are, when it comes to birthday parties at our house (or within the family) we have two local bakeries where we get our cakes.

The first bakery is Brieschke's Bakery here in Sylvania. They have a "peanut-free and nut-free" area in the kitchen where they prepare cakes in a safe spot. And the peanut/tree nut-free cakes are kept away from the other "unsafe" cakes in the pickup area. This is my favorite spot to get cakes.

Another safe place is Sautter's Markets (again in Sylvania). I ordered safe sugar cookies from here for Olivia's end-of-year party at school. And we've had a few cakes from here too - all peanut/tree nut-free.

That cake? Well that's Olivia's dad's birthday cake - a nut-free red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting. YUM!

If we're ordering cakes (or cupcakes) those are the bakeries we're using. Of course I also love to make box cake mixes (or "homemade" cakes ... ha!) ... and for the most part we've found that Betty Crocker cakes are great for peanut/tree nut-free options. (One exception is a Blue Velvet cake mix from good ol' Betty - it has a nut warning right on the label!)

The funny thing about cakes is sometimes - even when we know the cake is safe - Olivia won't eat it. I'm not sure if this is because she's 11-going-on-15 and she's being moody or if she's afraid the cake really isn't safe.

(An aside: I can't imagine what it's like to be afraid to eat something. It makes me sad to know this is Olivia's life right now).

So here's my tip for cakes: If you are hosting a birthday party and inviting kids with food allergies, call those parents and talk to them. If it's possible to get a nut-free and peanut-free cake (if the child in question has those allergies), do it. No one will know the difference (unless of course your kid loves German Chocolate Cake...then there's nothing you can do).

If the cake isn't going to be safe for the kids with food allergies you can either (1) have a safe alternative or (2) CALL THE PARENTS and let them know so that a safe alternative can be sent for their child.

I'll say this again - kids with food allergies shouldn't be left out simply because of their food allergies. If there is a way to include them when it comes to birthday party treats, please do so. You have no idea how much that means to the parents of those kids.

Now, if you'll excuse me I'm off to enjoy a slice of that nut-free and peanut-free red velvet cake. 

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